(no subject)
Mar. 7th, 2004 08:16 pmMy uncle passed away this weekend. I was going to do one of my typical long and grammatically incorrect journal entries but I don't have the energy at the moment. I saw him last surrounded by weepy family members in Beth Israel's Hospice ward. He was just skin and bones, looking into space without seeing anything. It was pathetic, horrifying, and just so very very heartwrenching. That's the closest I came to breaking down, the moment I walked past the curtain and looked at what he'd become. He passed away shortly before midnight, and we ended up staying at the hospital until around 4AM. They're still talking about the voodoo shit, which is infuriating me. But whatever.
What I realized for the first time during all of that was how damned lucky I am to have Jo in my life. She's been there for me when things were totally eff'd up more times than I can remember. I mean, this weekend I lucked out (I'll never get used to that phrase) because she was up here getting her braces, but she's taken time out of her schedule before to be there for me, like the time I had to go before the SC for the accident case. I know I treat her like shit sometimes (I can't help it; she's so damned chatty and I just can't stand that 90% of the time) and it makes me feel horrible. Heh. I couldn't help thinking during the ride back home after all was said and done that I can't be that bad of a person, low self-esteem be damned. If Jo can call me her friend (and she takes shit from no one), I must have at least SOME redeeming qualities about me.
Yeah. Think that's about it. I don't think his passing will truly hit me until the wake and funeral. God, I hate those things. Wish I could weasel out of them.
What I realized for the first time during all of that was how damned lucky I am to have Jo in my life. She's been there for me when things were totally eff'd up more times than I can remember. I mean, this weekend I lucked out (I'll never get used to that phrase) because she was up here getting her braces, but she's taken time out of her schedule before to be there for me, like the time I had to go before the SC for the accident case. I know I treat her like shit sometimes (I can't help it; she's so damned chatty and I just can't stand that 90% of the time) and it makes me feel horrible. Heh. I couldn't help thinking during the ride back home after all was said and done that I can't be that bad of a person, low self-esteem be damned. If Jo can call me her friend (and she takes shit from no one), I must have at least SOME redeeming qualities about me.
Yeah. Think that's about it. I don't think his passing will truly hit me until the wake and funeral. God, I hate those things. Wish I could weasel out of them.