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Bit and pieces
Feb. 23rd, 2008 01:23 pmLife's been crazy, per usual. I remember when I used to spend time pouring all that stuff on here. Nowadays I'm finding it harder and harder to invest the time and emotion. I'm turtling something fierce and it's not a good feeling. Anywhozit - what's happened in the last few days:
Monday my mother left work early in the morning, convinced she was having either a heart attack or some other cardiac issue. Bro and I took her to the hospital where we found out she was not actively infarcting, but was diabetic. Diagnosed on the spot after presenting with a high fasting glucose level and a huge glycemic index. All and all it's a good thing she wasn't in the middle of an event, because it took them almost a full hour to do an EKG on her. I mean, JESUS. She still occasionally has the cardiac issues that scared her (she says she feels like "[her]" heart is jumping out of [her] chest", and that it's been going on for the last couple of weeks), and I've been pushing her to follow-up with a cardiologist. As far as I can tell my father's being very insensitive about the whole thing, and that in addition to the influx of medical stuff (a prescription for Actos, learning how to use a glucometer and do fingersticks even when one detest needles, trying to figure out how to best incorporate exercise and a new diet [our meals tend to be carb-heavy: white rice and/or root vegetables, beans, and a token meat/fish]) and having to cope with it all has me looking very closely for another mental relapse. She seems okay so far. I mean, my mother's not overweight, but her glucose has been coming up elevated for the last year and her mother is diabetic, so you'd think it wouldn't be a surprise, but it's still a shock.
Tuesday I ended up cancelling an overtime shift to take litttle bro to D.C. for mom. He went to some Young People's Congress or some such - whatever the hell it is it strikes me as a bunch of money-stealing hokum, but the 'rents were enthused about him being "invited" and they paid the tuition, so whatever. I hadn't taken a ride on Amtrak since leaving school, and I enjoyed the experience. Across the aisle from us was a young man with a Liverpool accent and he was chatty as all fuck, telling everyone in his vicinity that he was trekking cross-country via Amtrak: New York to D.C., D.C. to Chicago, Chicago to the Grand Canyon. I was charmed, of course, and even the cynic in me found his tale nice enough not to tell him aloud that I thought he was a theater major from Julliard taking the method bit to a new level. Bro and I got to D.C. without a hitch, and rode the Metro to the vicinity of the conference which...okay, the Metro. It's, like, nothing. I mean, this is the shit I navigate every day. So why were we so stymied by the whole fare thing? It took us a good five minutes to figure out how much we should pay and how to purchase a card, then my brother ended up having to purchase another one when it only went through for one fare, throwing out the defective card. But you're supposed to swipe on your way out so that screwed me over and, seriously, what the hell is wrong with you, D.C.??? When we got to our destination I had to explain that we were out-of-towners to the station clerks and have an annoying man chastise me for no reason (if I *hadn't* realized I needed to keep the fare card do you think I'd come and tell you we'd mistakenly discarded my fare card and ask you if I needed to pay full-fare again? don't insult my intelligence). I dropped him off, made sure he was situated, then took the bus back to the Metro to start the trek back to NY while fighting sleep the entire way (I'd accompanied him straight off a shift).
The rest of the time's been work work and more work. The last couple of days have been rougher than usual, and I've barely managed to get home before 10AM. Thursday's shift had me so tired that after coming home and shoveling the sidewalk I tore off my scrubs and fell asleep without showering... which, considering all the bodily fluids I had to clean up during my time on the floor, is saying something. The intern I went to high school with shows up on the floor periodically and we chat. On finding out we'd gone to the same school and then finding out what college I'd attended some of my colleagues wondered aloud why I was I nurse. I'm sure my answer was as unsatisfactory to them as it sounded to my own ears. There are moments where I really enjoy what I do, and then there are big chunks of time where I wonder what the fuck's my damage. I have yet to run into a nurse on the job who doesn't project the idea that nurses and nursing in general is a job for those lower on the rungs. I think I need to surround myself with people who treat nursing as a profession, not just something you'd enter into because you didn't do well on the MCATs. Or, you know, take a vacation. Something along one of those lines.
Related to the above: 99% sure I'm going to Comic-Con (I requested the long weekend off), and 85% sure I'm going to Dragon-Con (trying to calculate a total cost at the moment). Two things to look forward to, at the very least.
Hope everyone is doing well. I'm trying to play catch up, and I apologize for the lack of comments.
Monday my mother left work early in the morning, convinced she was having either a heart attack or some other cardiac issue. Bro and I took her to the hospital where we found out she was not actively infarcting, but was diabetic. Diagnosed on the spot after presenting with a high fasting glucose level and a huge glycemic index. All and all it's a good thing she wasn't in the middle of an event, because it took them almost a full hour to do an EKG on her. I mean, JESUS. She still occasionally has the cardiac issues that scared her (she says she feels like "[her]" heart is jumping out of [her] chest", and that it's been going on for the last couple of weeks), and I've been pushing her to follow-up with a cardiologist. As far as I can tell my father's being very insensitive about the whole thing, and that in addition to the influx of medical stuff (a prescription for Actos, learning how to use a glucometer and do fingersticks even when one detest needles, trying to figure out how to best incorporate exercise and a new diet [our meals tend to be carb-heavy: white rice and/or root vegetables, beans, and a token meat/fish]) and having to cope with it all has me looking very closely for another mental relapse. She seems okay so far. I mean, my mother's not overweight, but her glucose has been coming up elevated for the last year and her mother is diabetic, so you'd think it wouldn't be a surprise, but it's still a shock.
Tuesday I ended up cancelling an overtime shift to take litttle bro to D.C. for mom. He went to some Young People's Congress or some such - whatever the hell it is it strikes me as a bunch of money-stealing hokum, but the 'rents were enthused about him being "invited" and they paid the tuition, so whatever. I hadn't taken a ride on Amtrak since leaving school, and I enjoyed the experience. Across the aisle from us was a young man with a Liverpool accent and he was chatty as all fuck, telling everyone in his vicinity that he was trekking cross-country via Amtrak: New York to D.C., D.C. to Chicago, Chicago to the Grand Canyon. I was charmed, of course, and even the cynic in me found his tale nice enough not to tell him aloud that I thought he was a theater major from Julliard taking the method bit to a new level. Bro and I got to D.C. without a hitch, and rode the Metro to the vicinity of the conference which...okay, the Metro. It's, like, nothing. I mean, this is the shit I navigate every day. So why were we so stymied by the whole fare thing? It took us a good five minutes to figure out how much we should pay and how to purchase a card, then my brother ended up having to purchase another one when it only went through for one fare, throwing out the defective card. But you're supposed to swipe on your way out so that screwed me over and, seriously, what the hell is wrong with you, D.C.??? When we got to our destination I had to explain that we were out-of-towners to the station clerks and have an annoying man chastise me for no reason (if I *hadn't* realized I needed to keep the fare card do you think I'd come and tell you we'd mistakenly discarded my fare card and ask you if I needed to pay full-fare again? don't insult my intelligence). I dropped him off, made sure he was situated, then took the bus back to the Metro to start the trek back to NY while fighting sleep the entire way (I'd accompanied him straight off a shift).
The rest of the time's been work work and more work. The last couple of days have been rougher than usual, and I've barely managed to get home before 10AM. Thursday's shift had me so tired that after coming home and shoveling the sidewalk I tore off my scrubs and fell asleep without showering... which, considering all the bodily fluids I had to clean up during my time on the floor, is saying something. The intern I went to high school with shows up on the floor periodically and we chat. On finding out we'd gone to the same school and then finding out what college I'd attended some of my colleagues wondered aloud why I was I nurse. I'm sure my answer was as unsatisfactory to them as it sounded to my own ears. There are moments where I really enjoy what I do, and then there are big chunks of time where I wonder what the fuck's my damage. I have yet to run into a nurse on the job who doesn't project the idea that nurses and nursing in general is a job for those lower on the rungs. I think I need to surround myself with people who treat nursing as a profession, not just something you'd enter into because you didn't do well on the MCATs. Or, you know, take a vacation. Something along one of those lines.
Related to the above: 99% sure I'm going to Comic-Con (I requested the long weekend off), and 85% sure I'm going to Dragon-Con (trying to calculate a total cost at the moment). Two things to look forward to, at the very least.
Hope everyone is doing well. I'm trying to play catch up, and I apologize for the lack of comments.
