Is the hardest part the first step?

I realized this morning that I'm having the hardest time working on my nursing stuff, mainly because I'm scared of the Letter of Recommendation part. I have the worst habit of burning bridges behind me once I'm done. It's ingrained in me at this point. I spent my childhood socializing with people that used me and talked about me, and so rather than subjecting myself to it anymore I'd just withdraw. I have no socialization skills to speak of, which is hard to comprehend for people that have a modicum of socialization skills.

Right; that's an entry for another day. I wrote my Psych Professor, the one who labored with me during the Research Paper from HELL (and the one who taught me, inadvertently, that I'm not cut out for research) finally, after one and a half years, and asked him if he'd be willing to write a letter of recommendation for me. This was the guy that told me when I was taking his course on Behavior Modification that I should seriously think about going to graduate school for psychology. This was the guy that put up with me day in and day out during the summer, when he could have just dropped me and I could have graduated with a Bachelors of Art. This is also the guy to whom I sent a semi-expensive "Thank You" present to after it was all said and done...and heard not a word from (I should have followed up to make sure he got it, but I was scared he, like, hated my guts; typical me). This was the letter I sent him:

Dear Professor W----,

My name is [Fredericks]. You were kind enough with your time a year and a half ago back to work with me in order to help me put together a final project on the uses of the Internet as a Therapeutic Measure for Gay and Lesbian Youth in order to fulfill my requirements for the Bachelors of Science in Psychology degree. I was wondering if you would be willing and/or available to pen a couple of letters of recommendation to nursing schools for me. I'd be more than willing to head up to Providence for a meeting, if that's your wish, and I have a couple of papers I submitted to you during the course of taking your Behavior Modification course which I can send your way.

Sincerely,
[Fredericks]

I've never requested one of these before so I'm unsure how to go about it. I'm also unsure if the dude will give me the time of day. BUT I suppose I give him five days or so, then wait until after New Years to write him again. I also figure I can get a rec from my Queer Lit professor. My last paper might have been crap, but she still gave me an A for the course. Then a friend of mine's father (who's a Chem professor at Columbia) said he'd give me a letter...rather, my *friend* said her father would be willing to write me a letter. Not precisely the same thing, but I'll take what I can get.

If I could only not worry so much about what others *might* think or say and do what I need to do. Dammit.

"Mama always said I was like chaos in a bottle..."

I Am A: Chaotic Good Human Ranger Bard


Alignment:
Chaotic Good characters are independent types with a strong belief in the value of goodness. They have little use for governments and other forces of order, and will generally do their own things, without heed to such groups.


Race:
Humans are the 'average' race. They have the shortest life spans, and because of this, they tend to avoid the racial prejudices that other races are known for. They are also very curious and tend to live 'for the moment'.


Primary Class:
Rangers are the defenders of nature and the elements. They are in tune with the Earth, and work to keep it safe and healthy.


Secondary Class:
Bards are the entertainers. They sing, dance, and play instruments to make other people happy, and, frequently, make money. They also tend to dabble in magic a bit.


Deity:
Shaundakul is the Chaotic Good god of travel and exploration. He is also known as the Rider of the Winds. His followers are typically rangers, and work to protect the land. They typically wear leather armor, and carry long swords and short bows. Shaundakul's symbol is a white hand with the index finger raised.


Find out What D&D Character Are You?, courtesy ofNeppyMan (e-mail)

Get off yer arse!!

Or not really.

It's that time of year again. Time to work out a lot and then jump off the wagon two months later. The Discovery Health Challenge is back again, and I'm recommending it this time because you get a free 8-week trial pass to Bally Total Fitness. I think I've mentioned them enough so that you people on my FL should know that they're the devil, but you get to use their place free for a bit. Not too shabby. I'm planning on taking advantage of it. And, you know, the whole health aspect is nice.

Luckily you can register online. Last year I had a hell of a time trying to get on this thing.

Some deity or another obviously likes me

My Professor replied to my pathetic request for a recommendation with the following:

[Fredericks], First of all, I want to thank you for the Bear gift you gave me. It is sitting in my office and I really love it! I would be pleased to write letters of recommendation for you so just send me the materials and I will take care of it.
Best wishes, Prof. W----

Heh. So, that's one down. I suppose I should e-mail my Queer Lit prof and get on my knees with her too.

I feel really good about this. Finally.

Last post of the night, I swear

"Come here, gorgeous. Let's make two and a half minutes of squelching noises." Richard Madoc, from Gaiman's Dream Country.

It's great because even out of context it's disgusting/amusing.