Sweet Jesus

[fredericks]

My menstrual cramps were so bad last night that I dreamt I was in labor. No frakking joke. I remember lying in the hospital bed with my someone next to me, perhaps the guy who'd knocked me up although I can't recall the face at the moment, and I was getting pissed because the "contractions" were coming relatively infrequently so I knew I wasn't dilating much. I ended up getting up and walking around the hospital with the irrational fear in the back of my head that I'd suddenly dilate the full 10cm and my baby would plop his/her way out on the nicely polished marble floor. Things fastforwarded to the delivery where I was freaking out about "pushing through the tearing" [ladies will know what I'm talking about, the gents can think about what's coming out from where and figure things out...don't you wish you could have babies now?] and then, I had a baby. A baby girl. A precocious talking baby girl whom I fed with a sippy cup. Yeah.

No more OB studying for me, I tell you what.

Comments

My dear...

[fredericks.livejournal.com]

I...I think I love you.

Now, what would Freud say about that? Hmm. I know what he'd say: "Yummy! Tootsie Rolls!" Because that's just the sort of man he was.

Re: My dear...

[snacktastic.livejournal.com]

Maybe. Maybe he'd say, "I you have castration anxiety."

I once did a play in front of a big audience about the Oedipal complex. It was done with sock puppets. It did quite well. I told my fellow players, "Of course, there are only a few universal truths in the world and one is that sock puppets are funny."

Re: My dear...

[snacktastic.livejournal.com]

Oh and icon love.