Sweet Jesus

[fredericks]

My menstrual cramps were so bad last night that I dreamt I was in labor. No frakking joke. I remember lying in the hospital bed with my someone next to me, perhaps the guy who'd knocked me up although I can't recall the face at the moment, and I was getting pissed because the "contractions" were coming relatively infrequently so I knew I wasn't dilating much. I ended up getting up and walking around the hospital with the irrational fear in the back of my head that I'd suddenly dilate the full 10cm and my baby would plop his/her way out on the nicely polished marble floor. Things fastforwarded to the delivery where I was freaking out about "pushing through the tearing" [ladies will know what I'm talking about, the gents can think about what's coming out from where and figure things out...don't you wish you could have babies now?] and then, I had a baby. A baby girl. A precocious talking baby girl whom I fed with a sippy cup. Yeah.

No more OB studying for me, I tell you what.

Comments

[frosty-pickle.livejournal.com]

Ow!

[snacktastic.livejournal.com]

It sucks when dreaming takes alot of work and energy and you wake up still tired. Ah, the freudian in me wonders if this represents that you are moving into a new phase of your life and the birth is often painful. But you can hit me if you want.

[zelle999.livejournal.com]

Ooooh, real life "pushing through the tearing" is so fun! So fun you might require 17 stitches afterwards! TMI, I know, but it's my badge of honor. Hee.

Those kind of dreams are so weird. When I was a kid, well, a teenager, I had pregnancy dreams all the time, but it felt like I was pushing my stomach out really far. I was honestly surprised that it didn't feel at all like that when I actually was pregnant.



By the way, Grey's Anatomy is my new favorite show. Do you medical types really have that much sex in hospitals? So un-hygenic!

[xioley.livejournal.com]

Tearing doesn't sound fun; episodimies (sp?) don't sound fun. I've heard it's possible to relax so that neither happens or are necessary.

[theoban.livejournal.com]

Agh! Scary dream!

[xioley.livejournal.com]

I mean episiodimies...I think.

[1x2foralways.livejournal.com]

Thanks for the forewarning, since I work in an OB/GYN office.

I hope I don't have a dream like that. Freakay!

[twoworldsin1.livejournal.com]

Just don't forget to tell the OB to "put in an extra stitch for the daddy". ;)

[fredericks.livejournal.com]

Dude, you're tellin' *me*.

[fredericks.livejournal.com]

Ah, the freudian in me wonders if this represents that you are moving into a new phase of your life and the birth is often painful.
The Freudian in you needs to go back to lusting after his mother.

The night before I remember thinking about how much the episiotomy stuff freaked me out, and I recall my friend telling me how *her* friend tore from V to A. Then - cue dream.

Or maybe you're right. Eh.

[fredericks.livejournal.com]

Do you medical types really have that much sex in hospitals? So un-hygenic!
Why JUST the other day...

Yeah. I'm pretty sure sexin' when you're supposed to be saving lives is a no-no.

Ooooh, real life "pushing through the tearing" is so fun! So fun you might require 17 stitches afterwards! TMI, I know, but it's my badge of honor. Hee.
I love how the lil' angel herself is looking mighty contrite in your icon choice. *grin* Aww.

[fredericks.livejournal.com]

Episiotomy, I think it's spelled. Eh. Every damned instructor pronounces it differently. Ideally the 2nd stage of a woman's labor will go slowly enough that there won't be tearing, but sometimes the kid's noggin is just too damn big or he/she is in too big of a rush to wait. The tearing isn't always due to the practitioner cutting, sometimes it occurs naturally (the debate, of course, is whether it makes more sense healing-wise to cut or to wait and see if there'll be tearing). It's a crap shoot. It's hard to relax when you're in that much pain.

And...God, I so didn't mean to type so much detail there. I hope I was vague enough that you'll not run screaming from the keyboard.

[fredericks.livejournal.com]

Dude.
Just dude.

[fredericks.livejournal.com]

Hee! Your Rent guy is staring at me so piercingly.

I totally forgot you work in an OB/GYN office. Let's hope you aren't forced to assist in an impromptu delivery.

[fredericks.livejournal.com]

You know, if you're going to impregnate me in my dream the least you can do is stay around to view the kid.

Hmph. Some guys.

[twoworldsin1.livejournal.com]

What? Is that how women feel about it? Believe me, I know even the most dedicated husbands and fathers wouldn't want to stick around to watch something crawling out of their wife's most private crevice. I had the privilege of watching exactly one live birth on video, and one was enough for me. I never wanted to touch another vagina again after that. (That feeling soon passed.)

[http://users.livejournal.com/_ms_anonymous/]

I have had cramps like that before. To say it SUCKS is an understatement!! Take lots of advil and get better soon!

[snacktastic.livejournal.com]

OMG, I had this dream and it made me think of yours. I'm going to get married and I'm in the locker room which looked like the one at the community pool and I am in my wedding dress and I totally start menstruating and I'm getting blood everywhere. People come back and forth and are like cheery and casual like it's normal to see someone in a wedding dress covered with mentrual blood and they talk to me and I talk to them. And THEN....then then, I try to get a maxi pad and instead i keep getting tons of uncontrollable candy pouring out and now only have a cup that i need to insert that seems unwieldly and then i wake up.

I thought that was a nice bit of too much information.

My dear...

[fredericks.livejournal.com]

I...I think I love you.

Now, what would Freud say about that? Hmm. I know what he'd say: "Yummy! Tootsie Rolls!" Because that's just the sort of man he was.

[fredericks.livejournal.com]

Ha. Seriously, I would want my SO to be in the room with me during the delivery. He doesn't have to be up "in the bidness" (hells, I've only seen a vaginal through large colorful illustrations in my textbook and even I was freaked out) but at least willing to stay with me and give me moral support as I push a child that's 50% his out of my chocha (and, yes, before you ask - "chocha" IS the correct medical term).

[fredericks.livejournal.com]

*grin* Oh, will do. Thanks for the sympathy and the advice. And welcome back to the world of LJ!

Re: My dear...

[snacktastic.livejournal.com]

Maybe. Maybe he'd say, "I you have castration anxiety."

I once did a play in front of a big audience about the Oedipal complex. It was done with sock puppets. It did quite well. I told my fellow players, "Of course, there are only a few universal truths in the world and one is that sock puppets are funny."

Re: My dear...

[snacktastic.livejournal.com]

Oh and icon love.

[modpixie.livejournal.com]

these kinds of cramps suck. to stop them, get a bottle of essential oil of pennyroyal and an eyedropper. drop 4-6 drops on your abdomen. it will give you warm tinglies and make the cramps go away.

[fredericks.livejournal.com]

That sounds like an excellent idea. Where can one go about acquiring pennyroyal oil, at a health food/whole foods store?