World - 1000, Me - 0

[fredericks]

Back from the 'Shack. I realized a few things today. Or maybe "realized" is the wrong word. Clarified a few things might be better. I bitched a lot about working for Food Services but I took real pleasure from preparing the meals that my fellow students would eat, or ringing up customers, or showing other workers the ropes. Part of what made the tasks enjoyable was the fact that I wasn't mentally taxed while doing them. I prepared crepes and omelettes with my brain on auto-pilot. It didn't take a rocket-scientist to cut up tofu or fill eclairs. I feel that I was given certain gifts, and, more and more, I feel like I'm wasting them. How am I utilizing all the smarts I was given? What about my musical ability? I haven't picked up my recorder in a month, and I haven't practiced the clarinet in more than a year. I think it's a conscious decision on my part to avoid anything that may be a challenge. Fear of failure holds me back. It kept me from trying out for the Performing Arts high school, from applying to other colleges, and from trying to go straight to graduate school.

But now I'm becoming maudlin. I should stop.

Okay. Today was all right. Not sales-wise, because it's been established that I suck at coercing people into signing up for cellphone plans, but experience-wise. As I mentioned above, I love helping people. I don't mind taking 15 minutes to help a customer track down a diode that costs $.69, even though I know that I get about 3 cents of commission from it. As long as the person finds what he/she's looking for I'm happy. And it's funny/sad how many of my co-workers aren't like that. It's what happens under the commission system. Instead of tracking a F-connector down for a customer they're likely to say we don't have it if they (my co-workers) think they have a potential "big buy" in sight somewhere else. I shouldn't shit on all of them, though. There's one who's been great to me so far, much more helpful than my manager. Rather than steal a customer from me he'll actually take time out and walk me through transactions, and then let me ring up the customers. He's the one ray of light I have in the store.

And my co-workers can get terribly bitchy. To the point where they'll sigh if a customer asks them something or roll their eyes if a customer wants help finding an inexpensive item. It's really pathetic. When I was helping one guy out he actually seemed amazed when I opened up some equipment and let him play with it. He kept asking me if I was from somewhere else, because (he claimed) I was too nice. I thought that a riot. I also learned today that if you can help guys find adapters and converters you're likely to get impromptu marriage proposals.

*sigh* So that's it. I'm hoping to get some quality Finding Nemo time in tonight, along with a good long stretch of sleep. Go me, it's my birthday. Go me...

Comments

BIRTHDAY!

[kommisar.livejournal.com]

Well, in that case....


HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

Just so you know, you are wasting your talents. But they are yours to waste. And did you ever think that maybe you just need a moment to regroup, refocus, reset, reboot???

Your life is not finished and your talents will not disappear. Pick up your clarinet and play. It's free. It's yours.

Happiness is what you give yourself.

I'll try and help, too. Happy Birthday! Enjoy your week.

Think more Un-Birthday

[fredericks.livejournal.com]

Oh no, I appreciate the hooray-ing, but it's not my birthday. That's just a slang-ism we say when we're happy about something. In my case I was being rather sarcastic when I was using it.

Don't worry, you'll know when it's my anniversary on the earth. I'll be soliciting presents well in advance. *grin*

And thanks for the dash of common sense. As always, you're good for it and I really appreciate it.

[gorzo.livejournal.com]

I realized a few things today. Or maybe "realized" is the wrong word. Clarified a few things might be better. I bitched a lot about working for Food Services but I took real pleasure from preparing the meals that my fellow students would eat, or ringing up customers, or showing other workers the ropes. Part of what made the tasks enjoyable was the fact that I wasn't mentally taxed while doing them. I prepared crepes and omelettes with my brain on auto-pilot. It didn't take a rocket-scientist to cut up tofu or fill eclairs. I feel that I was given certain gifts, and, more and more, I feel like I'm wasting them. How am I utilizing all the smarts I was given? What about my musical ability? I haven't picked up my recorder in a month, and I haven't practiced the clarinet in more than a year. I think it's a conscious decision on my part to avoid anything that may be a challenge. Fear of failure holds me back. It kept me from trying out for the Performing Arts high school, from applying to other colleges, and from trying to go straight to graduate school.

We're very alike in this regard, F. I too am chained by fear of failure. I mean, look at me, I can write and am apparently fairly witty and what am I doing with it? It's some great angst, let me tell you. One thing that I find helps me is that failure is not such a big deal, all in all. And it more often than not proves to be some of the best learning experiences that you'll have.

Radio Shack certainly does seem to have removed all incentive for its employees to even pretend to be helpful. I can't tell you the number of times I've stopped into my local store for some small connector and ended up leaving after twenty minutes of waiting because both of the sales guys were explaining in agonizing detail how to turn on a cellphone to some old guy who's only going to use it to clean his ears anyway. Not that I'm bitter.

And man, I can so understand the marriage proposals. For one thing, openly smart, friendly girls aren't as common as one might think. I know I get sick of running into women that I can tell are smart but hide it because they think guys will run away. It's a damn shame. This is espescially true when it comes to technology. A woman who can actually plug a mouse into the back of a computer instead of using it as neck jewelry or burning it as a witch is a huge turn-on for me. You know which end of the screwdriver to grip, dammit!

Not to get off on a rant or anything. Look, one of the things that I've had the hardest time accepting is that life has no schedule or requirements save what you impose upon it. Take some time for yourself. catch some breath, look around. Like Kommisar said, play your clarinet if you want, just for yourself. Ease up on yourself. All you owe anyone is to do right for yourself.