Notes on the day
May. 9th, 2003 09:03 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
fredericksI'm finally finally in my room and am able to say I have no desire or need to leave again for the night. I think I've passed the state of exhaustion for the moment and have entered a temporary "zone" of energy. Let's see how long this keeps up (and, oh yes, Boston's getting their asses handed to them on a platter with Jason Kidd's name on it...hahahaha...okay, moving on).
As made evident by the numerous idiotic entries I made last night, the day's been rather long. I had Brain Damage's last exam this morning and I was not prepared in the slightest, as in I hadn't cracked open the books for that class within the last week and a half (at least) and I hadn't glanced back over my notes since I wrote them *and* I managed to snooze my way through the last two lectures. Oh yeah, big time screwed. I needed to pass that exam to have a chance at passing the course for the year, since I'm rocking the B/C borderline. Heh.
While in the VW yesterday I was griping about the exam but I didn't really mean all that I said. I was worried about failing a little bit, sure (who likes failure?) but I felt different that afternoon, mainly because I'd gotten a chance to talk things over with someone in Psych Services. And partially because the night before I'd completed the annoying as all hell final project for CS. I felt like some of my burden had been lifted (if I was attempting to be melodramatic I'd say "the burden upon my soul was lessen") but instead of feeling renewed energy I just felt a better type of exhaustion. Almost a good exhaustion; the way you'd feel after you've completed a set of reps on the weights, but know that you have 2 more sets to go.
So I came home after work and I didn't really study. I looked over the notes that I could find, and I glanced at the few slides on the web, and I flipped through the texts but I didn't consciously sit down and study. Spent time cruising the web and getting IMed by an old acquaintance at 3AM. That last thing was weird. Here's someone who just stopped IMing me and then, out of the blue, a random question and no hello. It made me feel real special that after 6 months? of no contact he decides to send me an IM because he can't sleep. The concern about my welfare was touching [/sarcasm]. If I get started on this person this entry will mutate into another abnormally long rambling thing and I'm trying to avoid that.
So yes. I "studied" until 6AM, when Au Bon Pain opened up. I decided to grab some breakfast and coffee and sit in the alcove in front of Johh Hay? I forget. The research library on the Main Green. I figured it's usually a beautiful spot and it was outside, so the cool air should keep me awake. That lasted for all of an hour. I was sitting on cold concrete trying to read but being unable to concentrate. At 7 I went to The Blue Room, got a refill of coffee and headed back to my room, again to "study". That lasted for 30 minutes. At that point, with the final starting in an hour and a half, I decided to just say "screw it" and sleep until 9.
Woke up feeling like crap. I very nearly didn't make it to the exam, because I was so tired that I was weaving around the room like I was drunk. In the haste to wash up I got toothpaste all over my clothing (not realizing this until after I left the exam room). But, yes, I made it to the exam on time.
And I remembered next to nothing. It was hilarious, in a "you're going to fail this class" sort of way. The guy sitting next to me reeked of cigarette smoke and I'm fairly certain that he was attempting to cheat off of me. Jokes on him: I didn't know *anything*. That's why I like multiple-choice exams: if they're easily written you can make your way through them no problem with only a half-assed study effort. I BSed until time was up, handed in my exam, took a deep breath, and promptly put it all out of my mind.
Came back to my room and cleaned up for the first time in possibly weeks. There was so much paper scattered all over my floor I'm sure it was a serious fire hazard. I cleaned everywhere - scrubbed the shower and shower curtain, sink, toilet, floor, vacuumed, organized papers. It felt cathartic. Like I was cleaning my brain. Or soul (to be melodramatic again). Then I headed out to the beautician to finally get something done about my head. They did a gnarly job. I'd probably appreciate it more if I hadn't been falling asleep on myself in the parlor.
Heh. I notice that my paragraphs are becoming more and more disjointed and more and more distant as I write. That's because the little energy I had when I clicked on the LJ Client is gone. I think I had something profound to say, but I needed to wade back through my day to get to. Oh well. If it's that important I'll come to me tomorrow. Now it's time to get at least 12 hours sleep.
As made evident by the numerous idiotic entries I made last night, the day's been rather long. I had Brain Damage's last exam this morning and I was not prepared in the slightest, as in I hadn't cracked open the books for that class within the last week and a half (at least) and I hadn't glanced back over my notes since I wrote them *and* I managed to snooze my way through the last two lectures. Oh yeah, big time screwed. I needed to pass that exam to have a chance at passing the course for the year, since I'm rocking the B/C borderline. Heh.
While in the VW yesterday I was griping about the exam but I didn't really mean all that I said. I was worried about failing a little bit, sure (who likes failure?) but I felt different that afternoon, mainly because I'd gotten a chance to talk things over with someone in Psych Services. And partially because the night before I'd completed the annoying as all hell final project for CS. I felt like some of my burden had been lifted (if I was attempting to be melodramatic I'd say "the burden upon my soul was lessen") but instead of feeling renewed energy I just felt a better type of exhaustion. Almost a good exhaustion; the way you'd feel after you've completed a set of reps on the weights, but know that you have 2 more sets to go.
So I came home after work and I didn't really study. I looked over the notes that I could find, and I glanced at the few slides on the web, and I flipped through the texts but I didn't consciously sit down and study. Spent time cruising the web and getting IMed by an old acquaintance at 3AM. That last thing was weird. Here's someone who just stopped IMing me and then, out of the blue, a random question and no hello. It made me feel real special that after 6 months? of no contact he decides to send me an IM because he can't sleep. The concern about my welfare was touching [/sarcasm]. If I get started on this person this entry will mutate into another abnormally long rambling thing and I'm trying to avoid that.
So yes. I "studied" until 6AM, when Au Bon Pain opened up. I decided to grab some breakfast and coffee and sit in the alcove in front of Johh Hay? I forget. The research library on the Main Green. I figured it's usually a beautiful spot and it was outside, so the cool air should keep me awake. That lasted for all of an hour. I was sitting on cold concrete trying to read but being unable to concentrate. At 7 I went to The Blue Room, got a refill of coffee and headed back to my room, again to "study". That lasted for 30 minutes. At that point, with the final starting in an hour and a half, I decided to just say "screw it" and sleep until 9.
Woke up feeling like crap. I very nearly didn't make it to the exam, because I was so tired that I was weaving around the room like I was drunk. In the haste to wash up I got toothpaste all over my clothing (not realizing this until after I left the exam room). But, yes, I made it to the exam on time.
And I remembered next to nothing. It was hilarious, in a "you're going to fail this class" sort of way. The guy sitting next to me reeked of cigarette smoke and I'm fairly certain that he was attempting to cheat off of me. Jokes on him: I didn't know *anything*. That's why I like multiple-choice exams: if they're easily written you can make your way through them no problem with only a half-assed study effort. I BSed until time was up, handed in my exam, took a deep breath, and promptly put it all out of my mind.
Came back to my room and cleaned up for the first time in possibly weeks. There was so much paper scattered all over my floor I'm sure it was a serious fire hazard. I cleaned everywhere - scrubbed the shower and shower curtain, sink, toilet, floor, vacuumed, organized papers. It felt cathartic. Like I was cleaning my brain. Or soul (to be melodramatic again). Then I headed out to the beautician to finally get something done about my head. They did a gnarly job. I'd probably appreciate it more if I hadn't been falling asleep on myself in the parlor.
Heh. I notice that my paragraphs are becoming more and more disjointed and more and more distant as I write. That's because the little energy I had when I clicked on the LJ Client is gone. I think I had something profound to say, but I needed to wade back through my day to get to. Oh well. If it's that important I'll come to me tomorrow. Now it's time to get at least 12 hours sleep.
